Golf stocking stuffers have a reputation. A sleeve of logo balls. A novelty tee that says something about a husband. A towel from the pro shop that has never once been used.
She deserves a stocking that knows her.
This is What's in Her Bag, holiday edition. Same rules as always. Everything in here gets used. Nothing in here goes on a shelf. All of it comes in under $50.
The stocking
The Sleeves.
Four of them. One per person in the foursome, so nobody picks up the wrong can on Hole 12 and starts a whole thing.
The Stash.
A corduroy pouch for everything currently living loose at the bottom of her bag. The tees. The lip balm. The hair clip. The receipt from June.
The Locker Keychain.
A locker tag for a club she didn't need permission to join. It goes on her keys and tells everyone where she'd rather be.
The Lucky Charm.
A bead counter for the strokes she may or may not be counting. We're not keeping score. She can, if she wants. Nobody's checking.
The Hat.
No giant logo across the front. Just the 19th, tonal, for the people who know. She'll wear it to the grocery store. That's the test.
The Bandana.
Silk. Paisley. On her neck at a cold first tee, tied to the bag by the turn, in her hair by the patio.
A dozen balls in a colour nobody else plays.
Pink. Yellow. Matte green. She'll lose some. That's what the dozen is for.
A new glove.
The one in her bag is stiff and fraying at the thumb. Check the size on the old one first. Don't ask her. She'll know why you're asking.
Hand warmers.
For the April round she booked too early and the October round she refuses to give up. Canadian golf is a commitment.
A sunscreen stick.
The first thing everyone in the cart asks to borrow. Let it be hers.
A tee time, printed and folded.
The best thing in the stocking. Book the first round of spring and put the confirmation on top. Tuck in a printed Vibe Tracker so the round is already scored the right way.
If it ends up on a shelf, it was the wrong gift.
What's not in her stocking
A rangefinder. She didn't ask. She was never going to ask.
Anything that says "Golf Widow." Or any shirt with a joke about her swing.
A ball retriever. Leave it in the pond. That ball had a good life.
Stuff the stocking. Book the tee time. Stay for the 19th.
The Nineteenth Society
P.S. Shopping for the bigger gift? The full gift guide is sorted by which golfer she is. Not sure which one? Send her the quiz and pretend it's for something else.
P.P.S. Forward this to whoever is running the group gift. It's the Social Chair. It's always the Social Chair.